mother stress

Single Moms: Make The Best Out Of A Little

I recently read an article saying that quality trumps quantity, when comparing time with kids. Single Moms are, at least we think so, successful multitaskers (well all moms are). But now that we’ve included the quality time snatcher, Social Media, there’s no such thing as giving someone your UNDIVIDED ATTENTION! I remember my daughter was in middle school when I really started noticing her demand for more of my attention. Or maybe it was just me wanting to dig in her business more at that age. After I missed something she was trying to tell me because I was on the phone, I made a promise to myself that I wouldn’t get on the phone after I picked her up in the evenings, that ride would be totally dedicated to her because I knew the chaos would begin once we got home. With about 2 hours to spare after practice, for homework, bath time, dinner and bedtime. So the BEST TIME I had for QUALITY TIME was in the car.

I enjoyed this article because I have many conversations with Single Mothers that feel guilty about taking Mommy Time for fear that they are supposed to spend all of their time with their kids. After reading this article, I haven’t been giving bad advice. Nomaguchi said mothers’ guilt-ridden efforts to spend as much time as possible with their children may be having the opposite effect of what they intend.”

I want to share some quotes to stimulate your thinking from the article and of course invite you to read it at your leisure.

In fact, the study found one key instance when parent time can be particularly harmful to children. That’s when parents, mothers in particular, are stressed, sleep-deprived, guilty and anxious.

“Mothers’ stress, especially when mothers are stressed because of the juggling with work and trying to find time with kids, that may actually be affecting their kids poorly,” said co-author Kei Nomaguchi, a sociologist at Bowling Green State University.

Research does show that in highly stressed urban environments, having involved parents and even strict parents is associated with less delinquent behavior, Biel said.

In truth, Milkie’s study and others have found that, more than any quantity or quality time, income and a mother’s educational level are most strongly associated with a child’s future success.

While there’s no set amount of time that a parent needs to spend with a kid, I must agree that it’s quality time that matters most.

What’s your thoughts? Has time been a struggle for you? Do you have a routine that you don’t mind sharing with our community? Leave your comments below.

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